Warning – the following article contains nudity, swearing and numerous references to bodily fluids. If you are under the age of 18 (or are under 18 but already a parent, in which case congratulations for being able to read at all), then you might not want to read on unless an adult is present. [...]
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
So, here we are. It’s been a blast for the last few years but unfortunately with the economy picking up and Baby X yet to come to terms with the whole ‘don’t try to eat anything bigger than your head’ issue, I find myself with a whole pile of important things to do and not [...]
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
The infinite monkey theorem states that a monkey hitting keys at random on a typewriter keyboard for an infinite amount of time will almost surely type a given text, such as the complete works of Shakespeare. A now-extinct variant of the same theorem said that, “if you give a million monkeys a million typewriters, eventually [...]
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
Most of us like to think of ourselves as fundamentally honest and decent people. However, an awful lot of people are lying, cheating criminal scumbags who deserve to be forcibly sterilised so that their atrocious genes no longer form an oily slick upon our already shallow gene pool. The problem is that in their own [...]
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
My God, I’m tired. So very, very tired. Baby X has recently decided that he doesn’t like sleeping for more than a couple of hours at a time, and every time he wakes up he decides after about ten seconds that his life would be much much better if only his mummy or daddy [...]
Tuesday, May 19, 2009
The ethos behind the ‘Dirtbox’ group is to encourage the collaboration of young artists within the island and further afield. The development of an art community within the island was the primary concern for the founding members, as well as the trading of ideas and assisting one another through communication. They believe in bringing [...]
Sunday, April 19, 2009
A lthough you probably don’t think that the Jersey law of contracts is very interesting, it’s a bit like one of those discreet ‘clubs’ lurking in the darker corners of Amsterdam – because behind a boring-looking façade lurks i) a smoky, confusing haze and ii) a surprisingly large hole. This is because, unlike most European [...]
Thursday, March 19, 2009
I reckon that the vampire squid is the best evidence yet that either i) God doesn’t exist or ii) God, like the rest of us, occasionally wakes up in a bad mood and decides to take it out on someone else. The difference being that instead of reducing a hapless employee to a quivering wreck [...]
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
As Advocate X has spent the last couple of weeks single-handedly saving the global banking industry from total annihilation (and in an entirely unconnected coincidence, wondering what to do with the money he made from shorting certain shares), we thought we’d give you THE FIRST PART OF a selection of the caped crusader’s best bits [...]
Monday, September 1, 2008
You know, I had been tempted to do an article on obesity for ages, but had shied away up to now because i) my dear old mum had always told me that making fun of fat people makes them anorexic and ii) it was just far too easy to attack such big, plump, juicy, slow-moving [...]
Familiar with the Daft Punk Pyramid? Well I’m sorry Thomas and Guy-Manuel, but Etienne De Crecy has almost eclipsed your travelling stage with this epic installation. Those crazy french euro-house DJs, what will they think of next?
Popularity: 20% [?]
Familiar with the Daft Punk Pyramid? Well I’m sorry Thomas and Guy-Manuel, but Etienne De Crecy has almost eclipsed your travelling stage with this epic installation. Those crazy french euro-house DJs, what will they think of next?
Popularity: 20% [?]
According to our publisher, we’ve ‘had a thing’ about this video this month. I’m not sure what he means by that, but what I do know is that Gallery accounts for probably one fifth of the seven million, two hundred and eighteen thousand, two hundred and twenty nine times the video has been viewed at the time of writing. That’s 1,443,645.8 times. Yep, we’re so crazy that we watched it point eight of a time just to make the figures add up. Anyway, POWERTHIRST. It’s an energy drink for men.. MENERGY!
Popularity: 43% [?]
This month’s ‘Youtube video of the month’ was a close call between a Gallery favourite comedy classic involving a cleverly dubbed television advert and that epic new television advert featuring Brains from Thunderbirds dancing to Snap’s ‘Rhythm is a dancer’. No contest really.
Popularity: 13% [?]
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
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